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Post by dafyddapiago on Sept 7, 2006 18:42:12 GMT
A chap dies and goes up to the Pearly Gates to sign in. As he's doing so he notices lots of clocks, all at different time around the gates, so he asks St Peter what they are for.
St Peter replies that they are for all the really famous people, alive and dead, to monitor their truthfulness; they move on 5mins every time the person tells a lie.
"Oh" says the guy, "then whose is the one still at 12.00?" " That's Mother Theresa's" says St. Peter, "and the one next to it at 12.05 is Pope John Paul II's." There are lots of clocks at a variety of times, so the newcomer asks which one is Tony Blair's.
St Peter says " Oh God's got that one in his office as a desk fan!"
Dafydd ap Iago
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Post by bruceg on Sept 8, 2006 9:04:38 GMT
Hehehe  I remember a different version of that joke that's probably not appropriate for posting ;D |
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Post by pjaye on Sept 25, 2006 20:28:38 GMT
haha oh come on bruce share it u can delete it after a day and deny all knowledge! i liked that one though  |
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Post by bruceg on Sept 29, 2006 15:19:29 GMT
I definitely won't be posting it but you can always ask me to tell you it before the concert tomorrow night ;D
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Post by pjaye on Sept 29, 2006 22:31:14 GMT
you can count on that then!
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moy
Mezzo piano
Posts: 28
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Post by moy on Oct 4, 2006 20:32:49 GMT
Jim and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital.
One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end.
He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there.
Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.
When the Head Nurse Director became aware of Edna's heroic act she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now considered her to be mentally stable.
When she went to tell Edna the news she said, "Edna, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you're being discharged, since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of the person you love, I have concluded that your act displays sound mindedness.
The bad news is, Jim, hung himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but he's dead."
Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself. I put him there to dry."
"How soon can I go home?"
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Post by bruceg on Oct 5, 2006 8:36:20 GMT
lololol - very sick and very funny ;D
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Post by pjaye on Oct 11, 2006 18:47:19 GMT
Bruce did you tell me at the concert...? did i ask you how the french women holds he knickers... apparently i misheard its not knickers...  |
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Post by umchugger on Oct 12, 2006 11:51:32 GMT
You are in for so much ribbing at practice. Stuart told you that joke a week past Saturday and you still haven't got it |
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Post by rachel on Oct 12, 2006 11:57:30 GMT
she's got it now, i explained it to her ;D ;D
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Post by pjaye on Oct 12, 2006 16:40:27 GMT
i got it eventually! but seriously im not french! i was gonna use a comparison but shall stop digging a hole |
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Post by Sop brotherston on Jan 26, 2007 11:58:17 GMT
those are class
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